Oh Where to Start

It's been ages...

I have a bad quirky habit of quoting Disney and Disney-ish movies. I blame it on my upbringing. So, when I sat down and decided to update my little blog this was the first thing that popped into my head. I adore Roger from the Open Season movies. :)

So, it has been ages. A lot and nothing at all has been going on it seems...

We officially bought a house and moved in at the end of January. Our new house is in need of some good ol' fashion TLC and elbow grease. So far we've scraped away popcorn ceilings, had said ceilings refinished, have painted almost the entire interior of the house (the goals is to paint it all, so almost there), replaced the old creamy-yellowish-original plug ins and light switches, made built-in closet storage in the spare bedrooms, and are working on replacing the light fixtures. I'll try to post some before and after pictures just because I think they are fun.

We've been working like crazy on the house and will hopefully have a home visit from our adoption agency next weekend. After trying to get them here for almost 5 months now, I'll believe it when I actually see them on our doorstep.

A big part of my not updating this blog has been my waning optimism about adopting. Our agency laid off part of their staff last year, were busy finalizing the adoptions of those who were already placed, and pretty much fessed up to us that we were just more work that they put on the back burner until they could get caught up. This is something I can understand. I understand business. Supply, demand, and resource availability are pretty basic. What has been so disappointing is our case worker, in my opinion, didn't feel like she could share with us what was really happening with our file. It literally didn't get opened for the 4 months after  we moved and I started calling and emailing for our home visit. The home visit that is the one last thing we need to do before we can get our profile out there for birth moms to look at. The story we were told when we first moved was that they go over to Oregon all the time and they can get the schedule put together in a few weeks. Then it was sorry our November trip is already full. Then it was we aren't coming over to Oregon in December, how does January 13th sound? Oh, we aren't coming in January now because we have another couple we wanted to include on the trip and they aren't ready for the visit. Then it was...we aren't planning any more trips to Oregon. You need to talk to the director, maybe she can send out a case worker from Bend. And the story keeps going...but I think I'm out of breath.

At the end of the day they tell us a case worker from Bend is coming next weekend.

So, back to my waning optimism...I think I've shied away from sharing because I feel like we are trying with no result. Kind of like trying to conceive. This is our conception period of trying to grow our family. Weird thing to share with everyone. We are going to keep trying though and will hopefully have a progress update to share with everyone in the near future.

Happy Saturday all!

Packing :o)

We are packing! After putting in an offer a month ago, we will finally be closing on the house either next Tuesday or Wednesday. Purchasing a home was much more difficult this time due to the changes in the industry, but we are almost done and finally feel comfortable to start packing.

The best part about moving will be getting our homestudy redone finally! I emailed our caseworker today and we will be having a new caseworker come out from Bend. The downside of this is how much more they are going to charge us and how little they are actually supporting our file now, but it is better than starting completely over.

Who knew I would ever be so excited to pack up my stuff!

Holidays

There is magic and joy in the holidays that I find to be so completely addicting. The traditions we grew up with are now becoming new again as we've become adults and there are littles running around my older sister's house. And, of course, there are some new fun ones....like hay on the roof for the reindeer. It's apparently a farm thing. :o) Watching the holiday season through the eyes of a child is so honest and heart warming, which is exactly what I need this time of year. I need the heart warming magic and joy to help keep my heart patient. Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve was the last place I went with all my siblings just a few months before my brother was killed. So this time of year I think my heart yearns for that togetherness feeling that I once knew just a little more than usual. This year I have been so thankful and appreciative of living closer to my family. We've almost always travelled during the holidays and only missed the long ten hour drive over more than one mountain pass on ice and snow a little bit. The drive was becoming a bit of a tradition in it's own right though with our regular stop at Mom's house in Burns, grabbing coffee in Bend or Sisters, running the dogs at Lost Lake, and calling/texting the second we hit Sweet Home to let everyone know we were almost there.

So...this year was a bit different, but great. One new great experience we had this year was Jake and I getting to take my mom to the Nutcracker the day before Christmas Eve. Going to the ballet in Portland was fabulous! I absolutely fell in love with the venue, the ballerinas (the sugar plum fairy was my favorite), and the orchestra. And getting all dressed up to go out was fun too...

Jake doesn't dress up often, but is oh so extra handsome when he does!

An up-do :o)

And my super cute madre!

It really was a great experience. I don't know how often I'll be able to talk Jake into taking me to the ballet, but I can't wait to go again.

Then there was Christmas....

We got up really early on Christmas morning so we could make it down to Sweet Home before Amelia and Olivia woke up. We made it with plenty of time to spare, got the homemade cinnamon rolls in the oven, the coffee brewing, and then waited like kids ourselves for the girls to wake up.



Super adorable in their matching pajamas (tradition).

Papa with his little Doll.

These girls are just so amazing! They loved that they got presents to open, but they loved having so many people to play and share with even more. Amelia helped coordinate the present opening and was so excited to be the "giver". So sweet. And little Olivia wanted to stop and play with everything she opened. Papa Greg found himself reading the new books that got opened almost immediately.

I can't wait to see what next year brings!

What about a house?

What else could one impatiently waiting a home inspection for their adoption do with their time...well, why not a little house hunting. I love real estate anyway so having a reason to look for another house is fabulous. We found a house to rent while we made the quick transition from Idaho to Oregon, but after being home owners for so long we found it terribly difficult to be satisfied living in a rental. It took quite a bit of looking, a property we loved but had foundation issues so no-go, one with fall-in-love-worthy acreage that slipped through our fingers, but in the end...we might just have found something...

This cute little Spanish-style on half an acre is pending...we are under contract awaiting a home inspection scheduled on Tuesday! If they don't find anything major we hope to close by January 13th. It's too early to jump for joy just yet, but I can't help it. I love the idea of having our home awaiting our baby. If all works out this will be our family home! 

Profile

While we've had some extra time awaiting our agency we decided to get a jump on our profile. Wanting to document this time in our lives as we are expecting our first child we put in a call to Toby with Gobias Media to schedule a photo shoot. Toby does some of the most artistic and beautiful photos and we were excited to have him agree to meet us on a crisp fall day at Laurelhurst Park in Portland. We got some great updated photos of us and are still trying to decide which one to use as our main profile picture that will be sent out to birthmoms.

One thing we didn't anticipate was how old we look. :o) When did that happen?!?



A Little Reminder

It's always nice to see a little reminder like this. Things happen when they are supposed to. :o)

Waiting

I think everyone that we've gotten advice from has told us that the waiting involved with adoption gets hard. I, of course, thought it can't be that bad (kind of like, our children are going to be perfect and never cry in public). I mean we aren't one of those desperately-crazy-give-us-a-baby couples. Or so I thought. We may be approaching that status. Or at least, we have our moments. Or, to be more specific, I have those moments (I won't drag my husband into this crazy bucket with me...not yet anyway). Our wait has unfortunately started earlier in the process then we anticipated. We aren't waiting on a baby. We are waiting on our adoption agency. Some moments I'm okay with this, but without question there are moments where I am not. Our agency emailed us a couple of weeks ago and let us know that the case worker who is travelling from Boise to our area only comes to Oregon once a month and that November's trip was already booked. No room to fit us in the schedule. Awesome. December or January should work though. Awesome.

I should have known I would be challenged with the waiting aspect of this journey. Having patience is something I struggle with on almost a daily basis. I am patient deficient. I was born that way. Literally. My poor mother was only at the hospital for 20 minutes or so before I decided to show up. Maybe that was a good thing for her. Maybe not. I was born waiting for no one. Completely on my schedule. Really, who needs a doctor during delivery?

I'm ready to be a mom. Give me a baby. Now. Or maybe tomorrow...tomorrow is good too.

Actually what I find myself fixated on is what it will be like to get the news that a birth mom has chosen us. Will she be in her 7th month of pregnancy? (This is when many adoption agencies start having their birth moms look at profiles to choose parents for their unborn baby.) Or, will we get the phone call telling us we've been chosen and birth mom has already delivered...how fast can we get a flight booked? What will we be doing? Will I be in a meeting at work? Home cooking? Will I cry? Will the bags be packed and ready to go? I should make a list of what to pack. I always forget something...

Funny thing about this line of fixation is that I've totally skipped over details I still have questions about and we haven't been told about. Where and when do we buy a car seat? Crap - I should probably research car seats...oh wait, no need. I'll just call my older sister. She'll know what I need. Hello speed dial. My older sister and mom can rock-paper-scissors to see who gets the pleasure of my I'm-a-new-mom-and-don't-know-what-I'm-doing phone calls. Maybe I can split things up into day and night shifts for them...good idea. Any other volunteers?

When will I feel like a mom? I do already feel like an expectant mom...

So. What to do while we wait? Our case worker did praise us while she was at our home in Idaho for our "continuing on like normal" approach to the process. This was easier in Idaho. We didn't have delays. We also had a "normal". Since moving I don't think we've quite gotten into a normal routine yet, and getting to that point will be helpful. I think we get closer all the time, but we are missing our regular group of friends and supportive co-workers that we saw all the time.

Maybe I'll go into project mode. Do all the super-time-consuming things that people do when they are expecting...any ideas? If there were a couple little things you look back and wish you did in preparation for your kids, what are they?

I do need to go back and document all of the special adoption-days and milestones we have reached already. Sounds like a good place to start!